{"id":375,"date":"2022-07-22T20:32:20","date_gmt":"2022-07-22T20:32:20","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/meaningfulchangebook.com\/?p=375"},"modified":"2022-08-12T21:51:50","modified_gmt":"2022-08-12T21:51:50","slug":"what-kind-of-life-would-that-be","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/meaningfulchangebook.com\/2022\/07\/22\/what-kind-of-life-would-that-be\/","title":{"rendered":"What kind of life would that be?"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n

I had just come home from a conference where one of the speakers, a noted psychologist, was asking the hypothetical question:<\/p>\n

If you could take a \u201chappy\u201d pill that would relieve you from the pain, suffering and sadness that can define our days . . . would you?<\/p>\n

I posed the same question to my sixth-grader Mackenzie \u2013 who was in the back seat of our car as I was driving her to a friends house.\u00a0\u00a0I was a little reluctant . . . given the \u201cheaviness\u201d of such a question for a 12-year old . . . but I asked anyway.<\/p>\n

Without hesitation, she replied:\u00a0\u00a0\u201cWhat kind of life would that be?\u201d<\/p>\n

Precisely.<\/p>\n

Intuitively we know both sad days and bad days come with this life.\u00a0\u00a0We also know that it is these experiences that shape us the most — bringing a sense of grit, resilience and personal growth not found in the ordinary moments of our lives.\u00a0\u00a0Relatedly, a manager described how a difficult year had enriched her team in some unexpected ways:<\/p>\n

\u201cThe last twelve months were filled with hardship . . . taking us to the edge more than once.\u00a0\u00a0But we got through them . . . somehow.\u00a0\u00a0It strengthened our sense of purpose and who we are.\u00a0\u00a0We\u2019re actually starting to find humor in some of the darkest moments.\u00a0\u00a0Imagine that.\u00a0\u00a0We are glad to be through it . . . but in hindsight it was an amazing year<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n

I am absolutely sure you have experienced similar sentiments.\u00a0\u00a0Its all part of being human.<\/p>\n

In our work lives, we also know that managers are often ill-prepared to facilitate this kind of meaning-making.\u00a0\u00a0When the going gets tough, the not-so-tough behaviors we typically see are:<\/p>\n

1)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Suppressing<\/strong>:\u00a0\u00a0Not fully sharing the potential impacts of the poor sales figures \u2013 while hoping that things will magically get better on their own.<\/p>\n

2)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Skewing<\/strong>:\u00a0\u00a0Only highlighting the goods news in the recent re-organization announcement.<\/p>\n

3)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Sugarcoating<\/strong>:\u00a0\u00a0Providing an overly optimistic view of the limited career opportunities within the organization.<\/p>\n

The main reason is simple. Managers want to minimize bad news and the potential confrontations and ill-well that will follow.\u00a0\u00a0Like a good parent, they also want to protect the \u201ckids\u201d from the harsh realities that surround us.<\/p>\n

That\u2019s unfortunate.<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0It not only creates distrust from the lack of transparency \u2013 but it severely limits the \u201cmeaning-making\u201d and growth potential from dealing with adversity in more direct ways.\u00a0\u00a0The artful leader will see opportunities in the inevitable setbacks . . . opportunities to rethink our goals, our individual work, and how we work together.<\/p>\n

As holocaust survivor Viktor Frankl reminds us, we are hard-wired to find meaning in the most difficult situations.\u00a0\u00a0So, the leader leverages this insight with an overall message to the team that says:<\/p>\n

\u201cWe are going to have setbacks and challenges.\u00a0\u00a0Some will push us to our limits.\u00a0\u00a0My commitment to you is deal with them openly and honestly.\u00a0\u00a0I also believe these challenges can serve as opportunities for us to re-think things, creatively innovate, and personally grow from the experience.\u00a0\u00a0I can\u2019t wait for our first test together.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

Onward,<\/p>\n

Mike<\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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